Everything we have written
Written while building inbetween, mostly out of things we wanted to know ourselves. Every one of them cites where it got things, because almost nothing else written on these subjects does. Nothing here is a sales page: several will send you somewhere else entirely, one recommends a free app over ours, and one tells a particular reader not to use this at all.
When something has gone wrong
The three that get read at one in the morning. One of them will tell a particular reader to put the phone down and call a number instead.
How to apologize to your partner when sorry is not landing
The complaint is almost never that you did not say sorry.
How to rebuild trust in a relationship — it depends what broke
Two different injuries hide behind one phrase, and one of them gets the opposite advice.
Red flags in a relationship — difficult, or dangerous?
The lists give abuse and conflict avoidance the same bullet, which is why they cannot help.
When you want someone outside it
How to find someone who was actually trained for this, what the first hour is really like, and sixteen apps weighed against each other.
How to find a couples therapist who was trained for it
Most therapists offering couples work were never trained in it, and their credentials do not say so.
Couples therapy: what actually happens in the first session
What the first hour is really for — and how to tell whether you are in the wrong room.
Couples apps compared — a guide to choosing one
Sixteen of them, and what their own users say went right and wrong.
For the ordinary weeks
Nothing is broken; you would just like an evening that goes somewhere. These are the ones with the least at stake and the most evidence behind them.
Games for couples — nine to play tonight, and what they actually do
Nine to play from your own phones — and an honest account of what a game can and cannot do.
Questions for couples: the 36, and four things everyone gets wrong
All 36 in full — and the four things almost every page about them gets wrong.
Communication exercises for couples, and the 21 minutes that beat them
The best-evidenced thing anyone has found is private, written, and never shown to your partner.
Long distance couples — the part nobody warns you about is the reunion
Not doomed at all — but half never close the distance, and a third of those who do end within three months.